Ok I know it's been over a year since I did this but I've been busy. I'm not going to list the reasons why. Today I would like to talk about how relationships change over time if you will them to. I was watching a movie today with a very old couple in it. They were truely beautiful to me. I was amazed at how surprised I was to see them acting so in love. What happened to "til death do us part"? Do we say that and mean it or has it just become second nature? I wonder if maybe we could fix this. I feel like people have their standards too high now a days. I'm not one to talk for sure but I still agree with the aphorism from Ben Franklin. "Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterward. As I apply this to my life I cant help but wish I had someone to really rely on. I have strengthened myself and I have learned about myself but I really just want someone's shoulder to cry on. I feel so alone in a cold world. I have friends and all that but what my life lacks is a constant. no one ever stays around for long. I have tried to make deeper connections with some of my friends with little success. Maybe this whole lonely deal will be over soon. I could use a good buddy. Off to bed.